“I Hate Reading Logs,” says FedUp Mom

This is the sixth post by FedUp Mom, the mother of a fifth grader. FedUp Mom’s daughter used to attend a public school in suburban Philadelphia, but this year FedUp Mom moved her to a private Quaker school, hoping for a more relaxed environment. You can read her other posts here, here, here, here and here.

I Hate Reading Logs
by FedUp Mom

Every time I think we’ve solved the school problem something comes along to bite me in the rear. This week it’s the dreaded reading log. We found out about it from a letter the teachers sent home:

“Your child will be expected to read every night. We ask that you sign the log each night … We will also check the log regularly, in order to ensure follow through on your child’s part… Please sign the form below and return it to school tomorrow with your child.”

And now, the fun part:

“Thank you for your partnership in your child’s education.” (!)

And how does following the teacher’s directions make me a partner exactly? I feel more like an unpaid employee. Wait a minute — we’re paying them!

There was a little form at the bottom of the letter that said:

“I have read the above letter and agree to help my child by signing his/her log each night.”

I crossed this out and wrote in:

“We trust our daughter to do her reading.”

Then we signed it.

Then we sent the following e-mail to the teacher:

Teacher X: we have chosen not to participate in the reading log. We’ve experienced reading logs before and have these objections:

1.) They turn reading into a chore.

2.) They send a message that we don’t trust (daughter) to do the reading without meddling and micromanaging.

(Daughter) will do the reading she needs to do, but she won’t be logging the pages. Thank you.

I’m hoping that will be the end of it. I’m really tired of conferences and I’m sure we all have better things to do with our time.

1,097 thoughts on ““I Hate Reading Logs,” says FedUp Mom

  1. Wow. After reading through these I had to comment or feel horrible all day. I think that everyone’s emotions seem to be running really high on this topic. I am a teacher and have taught 4th, 5th or 6th grade for the past 17 years. I love my profession and I truly love working with children. That being said NCLB has made things harder for the teachers who care about more than test scores.

    I do give reading logs. I have many students who would absolutely not read if they had no accountability. But if I had a parent who came to me and told me that they wanted a different plan for their child with the good reasons which you all list (child reads lots, trust, etc) I would happily, joyfully exempt that child. It doesn’t have to be one size fits all.

    I’d like to ask all of you a sincere question and *please* don’t flame me I just want constructive opinions. I teach 4th grade. This is the homework that I give weekly–packet goes home Friday & is due next Friday: ONE essay prep activity (brainstorm topic, make an outline, etc), ONE reading comprehension activity, reading log for 100 min. weekly (done at any time), nightly math (about 10 problems). Now most of my students if not doing homework are not involved in enriching activities–they mostly play video games or watch (really violent) movies. If any parent were to come to me with the same concerns as listed here I would be a) thrilled to death b) happy to modify.

    So, what do you think?

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  2. Welcome bohoteacher!

    This discussion has been going on since January and yes at times it gets heated….but that happens when people are passionate. I think it’s marvellous we live in a culture that can handle this kind of debate and that we have the medium by which to carry it on.
    I hope both teachers and parents respond.
    The homework you described was written in teacher terms and you know what it is you are trying to “teach” by giving that homework. But I’m not a teacher, I don’t know what “essay prep activity” is. Could you give a bit more detail about what it is you are assigning and what the purpose of it is? What are the children supposed to get out of it? Do you expect parents to do anything?

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  3. I read that book by Kohn and also his book, “Punished by Rewards,” on the use of incentives in the classroom in my techer book club. We generally found his books to be thought very thought provoking. We had some great discussions, but ultimately found them lacking in practical alternative measures.

    I have been teaching first grade for 5 years and also taught kinder and second. First grade students ARE able to do many things independently. This has been evidenced by my own observations in my classroom, in addition to the fact that most of the parents of my students don’t speak English and can’t help them at home with most things. At the beginning of the year I usually have 2 or 3 students who don’t turn in their homework at first. After missing a couple of recesses, they make better choices and I pretty much get 100% homework for the rest of the year. I don’t like taking their recesses away from them or missing my breaks, but other measures have not been successful. My ultimate goal is that they learn; as their teacher I make the choice that I feel is for the greater good.

    There is no purpose to signing off on homework undone. The only possible little benefit would be that at least the idea of reading to/with their child crossed their minds for a milisecond. Doesn’t do much, but not much harm done either.

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  4. Frustrated in California said:

    “After missing a couple of recesses, they make better choices and I pretty much get 100% homework for the rest of the year. I don’t like taking their recesses away from them or missing my breaks, but other measures have not been successful”

    You really didn’t get anything out of Kohn’s books.

    “This all hurts me more than it hurts you”….

    I get a chill.

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  5. Example of Essay activity: In class we work on 3 things you like about our school and write 3 detailed sentences about each one. At home you are expected to write 3 things you like about our state and write 3 detailed sentences about each one.

    I have also read Alphie Kohn’s books and even corresponded with him by e-mail on some questions. Not giving homework is not an option for me at our school/district, but I try to make it relevant as possible.

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  6. From “Bad Teachers”, by Guy Strickland:

    “… approved teaching methodology does not equal student learning, and there are many reasons. The biggest reason is that approved teaching methodology is not even aimed at student learning; its goal is classroom management, which is a whole lot different from learning.”

    “…Listen to the teacher talk. If she talks about what she is doing rather than what the teacher is doing, gently bring the focus back to the children. Ask how the teacher knows how the methods are working; ask for evidence that the children are learning.”

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  7. Frustrated in California writes:

    *************
    At the beginning of the year I usually have 2 or 3 students who don’t turn in their homework at first. After missing a couple of recesses, they make better choices and I pretty much get 100% homework for the rest of the year.
    ***************

    I agree with PsychMom. That’s pretty cold. I don’t sense a lot of sympathy for the kids here.

    Frustrated, I posted the above excerpt about method-obsessed teachers because your comments reminded me of it. In your comments, I read a lot about you and how hard you work and how you achieve 100% homework compliance. But I don’t see much about the kids. Do you see the light of curiosity in their eyes? Who are they? What do they care about? You know what you’re teaching, but what are the kids learning?

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  8. Whoops, I put a typo in the Guy Strickland quote. It should have said,

    “If she talks about what she is doing rather than what the CHILDREN are doing …”

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  9. To bohoteacher….Ok that’s a start but you didn’t tell me anything about what you think the kids get out of this exercise. What are they supposed to learn?
    And you just told me about the essay prep (I think)…you mentioned two or three other things that are expected each week but didn’t elaborate on that….

    How can we comment (you asked for comments) if we don’t know what you’re doing and why you think it’s important?

    I was at a curriculum meeting for my daughter’s class last night and the teachers just breezed through the list of math goals, mostly written in teacher-ese. It was only when I asked specific questions about what things meant, that I understood what exactly she was teaching.

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  10. The distinction (referred to above) between “classroom management” and “student learning” is a crucial one in this discussion.

    Thinking about this further: How much of the homework students (especially younger than high school-aged) receive is intended to address perceived social issues rather than academic ones? Teachers here frequently reiterate the belief that too many parents are uninvolved, that children are unmotivated to read outside of school, therefore work must be assigned to all students to be done outside of school.

    As a parent, I cannot stress enough to teachers that, first of all, such well intentioned homework may not be the answer to those concerns and, secondly, it certainly is not benign to students who are already curious, love to read and are self motivated to learn. The drudgery of homework for the sake of homework is demoralizing and de-motivating. It doesn’t build character, it builds resentment and hostility to school. Parents who send happy, curious children off to school cannot be expected to stand by and watch helplessly as the love of learning is drilled out of them.

    We’re just asking our leaders, our adminstrators and our teachers, with all due respect, to please reconsider this ingrained approach.

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  11. bohoteacher said: “Example of Essay activity: In class we work on 3 things you like about our school and write 3 detailed sentences about each one. At home you are expected to write 3 things you like about our state and write 3 detailed sentences about each one.”

    I find (now for my kids and the same when I was in school…things don’t ever seem to change) this kind of assignment really frustrating. The concept is OK, but why force the kids to say the like something if they don’t? Leave it a little more open ended and see what you get. You may even get some valuable feedback.

    Reminds me of the awful school song that our elementary school music teacher tried to force the kids to sing a few years ago (“Worthington is great, Worthington is grand, Worthington is…the best school in the land” and so on…). The fifth graders (including one of my sons) would have nothing to do with it and put a great deal of creative energy into coming up with a scathing rendition of their own. The school learned their lesson and the official version has never been heard again.

    Treat kids with the same dignity you’d give adults and let them hold and express their own opinions and you’d be amazed at what kids can do–and learn.

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  12. “I read a lot about you and how hard you work and how you achieve 100% homework compliance. But I don’t see much about the kids. Do you see the light of curiosity in their eyes? Who are they? What do they care about? You know what you’re teaching, but what are the kids learning?”

    I wish you could come to my classroom to see for yourself… My students are excited to come every morning. They are joyful participants in what we do. They know that when they step into the classroom, they are in a safe, fun place to learn. If I didn’t see the light of joy and excitement at learning new things in their eyes, my efforts wouldn’t be worth it.

    Other teachers ask to observe my class to learn how to build community in their classrooms. I am a certified TRIBES trainer who provides training to other teachers, adiministrators and psychologists who look to create nurturing learning communities in classrooms o school-wide.

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  13. Just an observation…when I googled “TRIBES Trainer” to find out what PARENTS think of it (not good), I came up with a bunch of hits for “Lemmings”.

    Is it just me or does that say it all? 🙂

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  14. zzzzz78759,

    I was surprised that you had found such negative parent responses to TRIBES. I googled “TRIBES Trainer” to see what you might be seeing. I only found one parent review posted within the first couple of screens; it was very positive. I also found articles: “TRIBES Trainer wins Awards,” “Building Communities of Learners,” “Making a difference in the lives of children and their families,” etc.

    It appears that there is an online game about Lemmings. If someone wants to, they can download some training for their online lemmings tribe… I don’t think that the existence of this game should affect your opinion of some of the things that happen in classrooms.

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  15. Yes, zzzzz7859, could you post links to parent comments? I couldn’t find much either.

    I get the impression that “TRIBES” is mostly used with low SES kids, whose parents don’t have so much of an internet presence. The parents of Frustrated’s kids mostly don’t speak English, so I wouldn’t expect to see a lot of their comments on the web (and I couldn’t read them anyway!)

    There’s an enormous gulf between teachers and administrators on the one hand, and parents and students on the other. Programs that appear to be fabulous to teachers and administrators are routinely panned by parents and students. Spend 5 minutes at kitchen table math for more on this.

    http://kitchentablemath.blogspot.com/

    For Frustrated, if your parents don’t speak English, how do you communicate with them? Do you provide a translator for parent-teacher conferences? What’s their language?

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  16. Dang, I can’t find it again. There was a couple of comments from parents who felt that the “Tribes” program was forcing children to fit into the “culture”, ignoring the family culture.

    If I find the link again, I’ll post it. But once I got around the Native American (and other tribes) and the Lemmings (which I still think is funny and yes, I know it’s a game) and the propaganda posted by CenterSource Systems, it was difficult to find. And yes, I agree, the parents of children targeted by Tribes, have limited access to the Internet.

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  17. PeggyinMA — I wanted to respond to your comment about the difference between classroom management and learning. I posted the Guy Strickland quote because it made a lot of things clear to me.

    Once you realize that most of the things that go on in school are about classroom management, not learning, you can better understand the garbage that gets sent home as homework. It’s an extension of the principles of classroom management into the home. Sure, making that umpteenth poster might not teach your child anything worth learning, but it’ll kill a half hour (or more!) and demonstrate your child’s compliance with school rules.

    This is why the homework issue is the tip of the iceberg. There is so much more going wrong.

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  18. PeggyinMA also said:

    “Parents who send happy, curious children off to school cannot be expected to stand by and watch helplessly as the love of learning is drilled out of them.”

    This statement defines clearly why I’m commenting on this site frequently. I’m watching, I’m paying attention…and not wanting to ever hear from my child:……”ohhhhhh do I have to school today?, it’s so boring”.

    The day I hear that, my heart will break. Because where do you go from there, when you’re in Grade 3?

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  19. I haven’t been able to go through and read all of the comments here, so sorry if somebody has already brought this up. But several of the teachers commenting have lamented that parents are not involved enough, and so they have to had reading logs, etc, to force that. It seems to me that that is going about the problem the wrong way. What better message could you send a child than to say “hey, I know your parents may not be too into this parenting gig, but they don’t control your destiny. You do, and I’m not going to assign anything that I don’t think you could do on your own.” It’s another reason to try to avoid sending anything home at all, knowing that the home situation may not be conducive to learning. And at the other end of the spectrum, having homework that requires parental involvement is license to the helicopter parents you complain about to be over-involved and coddle their kids. Expecting independent achievement is a win-win.

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  20. To CLT:

    OK, who let the really smart person in? You are absolutely right. That sense of inner accomplishment is what I’m trying to give my daughter by NOT running her schedule for her. If I remind/hound her every day to do what’s assigned, how does she ever feel in charge. But by the same token, if she’s too young to be able to keep it all straight, and she is given things she can’t do on her own, the teachers are setting her up (and me) to fail.

    What I think happens is that the teachers who insist a) that they have “no choice” and b) insist on assigning reading logs and other mechanisms of parental control, simply want control. They have too many kids to deal with, are squished between parents and administrators and feel no inner sense of self destiny, and feel they must exert control somehow….

    Otherwise why insist on something that simply doesn’t work for all kids and families? Why the rigidity?

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  21. PsychMom- I agree. In my utopian public elementary school, the student-teacher ratio would be about 5-1,
    there would be no homework and no pedantic focus on busy work.

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  22. One more thought…….it seems to me (at least at my daughter’s school where all of the teachers are women) that many have a sort of passive-aggressive personality type. So many of the mothers are reverent towards them and rather naive to the manipulative tactics the school employs.

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  23. Been reading through more comments, and have some more. I was really disturbed by Frustrated in California’s original statement that most kindergarteners don’t start school able to count to ten (nonsense) and write their names (so what?). I was even more disturbed by her follow-up post where she says “I understand that students are not developmentally ready to read and write at 5, but they are required by the state to leave kindergarten able to write a good, complete sentence. For students who can’t recite the alphabet or recognize their name, this can be a challenge.” (#299). Now, this deplorable state of affairs isn’t Frustrated’s fault, but where is her outrage about it? The state shouldn’t:

    A) have requirements that are developmentally inappropriate, or
    B) have kindergarten requirements that are not attainable by true academic beginners in one year.

    It frustrates me that this sort of mismatch is going to fuel the push for starting kids in school earlier, when it would probably actually benefit them to start later.

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  24. I taught math and reading in a Title One school. It was a pull-out program, so I had the luxury of having my students one-on-one. What I noticed- and it was even more striking with the fifth and sixth graders than with the younger kids, was that they actually were fairly good readers. They could sound words out, many of them had decent fluency, etc. What they lacked was the life experience to make the stories have any meaning to them. I’m not talking about complex adult themes. They couldn’t relate to stories about kids who went out and had adventures or used their imaginations or cooked or interacted with families or ran into bullies on the playground. As had been pointed out on this site, homework often takes away from opportunities for the child to develop in other areas, and so had the potential to keep these kids back from reading comprehension.

    On a tangentially related note, as a fairly introverted person, I would have benefited as a child from having someone try a little harder to draw me out of my book-induced inner world. Reading is a great learning tool, but it’s not the only one, and it shouldn’t be used to the exclusion of all other experiences.

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  25. I am in school now learning to be a teacher and came across this website while looking for information on reading logs. I have already noticed many parents that make it so difficult to teach their children. Thanking you for your partnership in your child’s education is more of a plea. Please participate in your child’s education. Don’t you want your child to grow up very intelligent with every opportunity in the world at their fingertips? Then you need to partner with the teachers. They cannot do it on their own and you taking a stance against them, your unwillingness to help the teacher do his/her job will in the end hurt your child. Yes, teachers get paid… but not much. Not enough that they chose the job for the money. They choose the job to make a difference. It really does bug me when a parent, just because they feel the need to make an issue out of every small thing, gets their children out of doing the assignments that everyone else has to do. You are only hurting your kids. The only time a parent should really fight a teacher is if the teacher is doing something unethical. Asking your child to read and asking you to help your child read is in no way unethical. Children cannot be with their teacher 24/7 and must rely on their parents’ assistance at home. I used to be an opponent of homework, I used to think that school work should only be done at school and not be brought home to infringe on my time with my kids, Let me tell you though, that I have since changed my mind. After seeing how horribly students are doing in US schools I began to think maybe 8 hours a day is not enough time to cover a multitude of subjects. I want my kids to have everything life has to offer, but if I try to get them out of doing their homewrok by crying foul everytime I would have done something in a different way than the teacher chose, my kids will fail at life. The teachers have been trained at using these tools to help your child, not to brand them liars. They have you sign the paper so they know that you are participating in your kid’s reading, not so they know the kid did the reading. You just showed the teacher that you are a combative parent and that they cannot count on you to participate in your child’s learning. Your child will probably have to receive more help at school and it will go in her records that her parents take no interest in her school work. A good teacher will try to help her more becuase of this, a bad teacher will give up on her. You should always try to partner with the teacher if you care about your child’s school. Take an interest, make friends with the teacher. Talk to the teacher if something’s being done that you don’t quite like and see if it can be resolved. That’s the way to handle the relationship with the person controlling your child’s education… don’t fight them… they fight 20-30 kids everyday and do to need to fight and additional 40-60 parents. You don’t need to make every issue a fight or a tell all book when you could simply have a meeting with the teacher. The good ones are always more than happy to meet with you and the bad ones. well you can go above them…

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  26. Courtney, I have two things to say to you. You have a lot to learn and I am thankful you are not my daughter’s teacher. Whatever makes you think I don’t care about my child’s education? Or that she does not read, was not read to, or that we don’t care about reading. Little do you know that reading is the most important activity in our household!

    Let me give you some advice. You might try breaking up your essay into proper paragraphs. I found it very difficult to read, so I must confess, after the first few bars, I just gave up.

    Courtney, you are still young. You might start with some humility. We’ve been doing this a lot longer than you and you could learn a lot from us just by patiently listening. We are parents. We are wise and seasoned and are extremely good at what we do best here, parent, nurture, guide, inspire and yes, educate our young. If you do plan on pursuing a career in education, you might start by respecting the very people who send their children to you. After all, as you said, it’s a partnership.

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  27. Courtney says:

    **************************
    After seeing how horribly students are doing in US schools I began to think maybe 8 hours a day is not enough time to cover a multitude of subjects.
    ***************************

    Kids aren’t doing horribly because 8 hours a day isn’t enough time. They’re doing horribly because schools waste those 8 hours a day with pointless nonsense. More hours of pointless nonsense won’t solve the problem.

    *****************************
    The only time a parent should really fight a teacher is if the teacher is doing something unethical.
    *****************************

    Nope, I don’t agree. I think I have a right to fight the teacher if she’s messing up my daughter’s education, for instance by turning reading into a chore.

    *****************************
    Asking your child to read and asking you to help your child read is in no way unethical.
    *****************************

    Right. The unethical part is telling me to sign my child’s reading log every night, thus making me an enforcer of a scheme that I’m opposed to.

    ****************************
    Children cannot be with their teacher 24/7 and must rely on their parents’ assistance at home.
    ****************************

    This would almost make me laugh if I wasn’t so busy crying. You think my child would learn more if she was with you 24/7? After you’ve failed to teach her anything in the 8 hours a day she was in school?

    Actually, there’s a really important point in here. You think the child will not learn unless you, the teacher, are involved, either directly in the classroom or indirectly through your parent-assistants. Think how very patronizing your attitude is. We parents know our child better than you ever will. We know what she needs, we know what our goals for her are. Allow us to spend our time with our children as we see fit. I guarantee that my children have learned more from their parents than from any teacher they will ever have.

    ***********************
    They have you sign the paper so they know that you are participating in your kid’s reading, not so they know the kid did the reading.
    **********************

    It’s not your place to tell me what to do, or to make me prove to you that I’m raising my kids the way you want me to. It’s really none of your business.

    And if my kid does the reading without my participation, isn’t that the best possible outcome? It’s her education, right?

    ***********************
    The teachers have been trained at using these tools to help your child,
    ***********************

    No, they haven’t. Have you been following the news about our mediocre teacher education? Even Arne Duncan says teachers are badly trained. From this article:

    “A report by a former president of Teachers College, Arthur Levine, found that roughly 60 percent of education school alumni said that their programs did not prepare them to teach.”

    *********************
    It really does bug me when a parent … gets their children out of doing the assignments that everyone else has to do.
    **********************

    The purpose of school should be learning. The more you make school about “doing what everyone else has to do”, the more you have missed the boat.

    *********************
    Your child will probably have to receive more help at school and it will go in her records that her parents take no interest in her school work.
    *********************

    Oh, please. The old “it will go in your records” dodge? I am so beyond that.

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  28. A few more notes….Courtney proposes; “Take an interest, make friends with the teacher.” I see the very weird dynamic that plays out when mothers “make friends” with their kids’ teachers. My “friends” do not make subjective judgements about my daughter’s ability to learn and her behavior. Further, my “friends” do not use manipulative tactics to “engage” me in my daughter’s education. My relationship with my daughter’s teacher is a professional one at best. Unlike a doctor I am unhappy with, I cannot sever this relationship if I am unhappy with the teacher and her methods.

    Also, I have found the bad ones are vindictive and the principal will advocate for them no matter what.

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  29. From “Bad Teachers”, by Guy Strickland:

    **************
    The principal is the “headmaster” or “head teacher” of the school. As such, he is responsible for teacher morale and enthusiasm. These teachers are tenured, so the principal knows they are going to be around long after Johnny is a fading yearbook photo. He must defend the teachers, right or wrong, so that other teachers know that they will be defended, too. Bastions of ignorance aren’t bastions for nothing.
    ***************

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  30. Agreed, FedUp and Disillusioned. Excellent points. Very important to dig beneath the surface or we will never get anywhere..

    Disillusioned, you wrote about how most teachers are women and thereby many of them are passive aggressive. Women are socialized to supress their true feelings so they become conniving. The Stepford Wives you describe, Disillusioned, try to curry the teachers’ favors by being all smiling, conniving, servile. The teachers in turn manipulate that control by sending out signals that their children will be rewarded for all that compliance and brown nosing. No where do you see this power play acted out more than in the homework arena. Compliance buys your child teacher’s pet, lead role in play, choice teams, coveted projects, preferred seating.

    In the end, each group manipulates the other and it leads to a constant undercurrent of distrust and simmering resentment. The mothers, of course, have the most to lose. They have no power although they think they do because they have commandeered the PTA. As Disillusioned wrote, they treat parenting like a job and they are over-invested in their child’s achievements. The smiling, sweet, impeccably dressed wealthy women who don’t work are keenly aware the teacher has their child all day and it puts the mothers in a precarious position of powerlessness (love alliteration!) and fear.

    And I don’t even have a psychology degree.

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  31. Correction: I just wrote: “No where do you see this power play acted out more than in the homework arena.”

    Ooops. NOWHERE, meant to write. I hate mistakes!

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  32. Amen. Indeed, “each group manipulates the other and it leads to a constant undercurrent of distrust and simmering resentment.” I have also noticed the PTA moms are classic enablers. They volunteer in the front office, grade the teachers’ papers and homework, buy lavish presents for teacher birthday’s, copy weekly homework assignments for the whole class, etc. (By the way, the copy machine is in the teacher’s lounge and if the lowly moms are making copies when a teacher comes in, they must stop copying and leave!)

    I am always struck by the illusory “stories” these PTA moms tell themselves. If my child’s teacher doesn’t like me, my child will not get the same level of attention from the teacher and will not be ready for next year. I have heard PTA moms condemm a kind hearted, nurturing first grade teacher (whom I thought was great because she saw the best in the children) because she “didn’t get them ready for second grade.”

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  33. Wow…I have things to say to teacher Courtney…but you guys have covered the high points. I agree with both FedUpMom HomeworkBlues, the discussion has gone way past this level of discourse. This young teacher needs to do some serious reading and research. My biggest rebuttal would center around the subservience she seems to think parents should fall into. She’s placing herself certainly as lead dog on the sled race to nowhere and we’re all supposed to be helping her!!! Not this Momma. And my kid is not getting on that sled.

    It’s Ok…we’ll all probably still be here 5 years from now when she’s got some real experience and maybe, hopefully, has changed her mind.

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  34. Homework Blues — are you a fan of the “Godfather” movies? Your attempt to take a break from this blog reminds me of this moment:

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  35. You guys are the best! FedUp, I laughed so hard, I had tears running down my cheeks. Yes, I’m a fan of the Godfather movies and my husband and I quote classic lines from them all the time.

    You have no idea how much I needed this comic relief this morning. Just had a meeting with the school over some lingering something. Oy, vey. They forgot we even had the meeting and we lost precious minutes hastily organizing it. We woke daughter up even earlier so we could make it. I hate meetings before school officially starts.

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  36. I posted what I think is one of my all time best responses last night. It was a follow up to Courtney, as I continued to read reaction. And then my computer went BBBZZZZZZZZZ and I lost the whole darned thing. I’ll try to recreate and repost.

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  37. Courtney said so many things that made me wince but this is one of the biggies:

    ” I want my kids to have everything life has to offer, but if I try to get them out of doing their homewrok by crying foul everytime I would have done something in a different way than the teacher chose, my kids will fail at life”.

    I don’t understand how you can claim to have been reading this thread on this site, and deduce that parents here “try to get” their kids out of doing their homework, as if we’re signing notes that say “please excuse MY child from what everyone else is doing.”

    We’re not trying to excuse kids from work….we’re saying that asking all children to engage in tasks that are pointless and have nothing to do with learning to read…is detrimental to the learning process. We’re saying 6.5 hours of school a day is enough for young children.

    And then you assume that those shirking kids, whose parents excused themselves from signing reading logs, will have miserable lives, amounting to nothing. You know, when I was in elementary school, Grade 3 was not a good year…the teacher was continually sick, and when she was there she wasn’t particularly engaged with the kids. What got me though that year was my mother. Downplaying the teacher’s neglect, she kept me feeling OK about school…and she also taught me that year, and many other times, that sometimes what you get fed is just nonsense. See it for what it is and move on….

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  38. I struggle to see how any of you have any time to do anything with your kids or pertaining to their education when you have seemingly endless time to write these eloquent posts. Stop whining, do the work, and be done with it…
    Please ladies, grow up.

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  39. Mike, we write these comments when our kids are in school and when they are asleep. Which is my home is too much of the fomer and too little of the latter.

    Stop whining and do the work, you say. Sure, no problem. My high schooler logged a 24 hour homework weekend. Enough for you? Or do you think she should have done more? Because this was light in comparison. Last week, from the moment she got home on Friday to when she bed to bed at 2am Monday, she did homework non stop except for an hour to go to a choral practice.

    See why I’m whining? Get the picture?

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  40. Mike, to add, you must labor under the illusion that the homework amount is reasonable and doable. Stop complaining, do it and be done. I might complain less if it was ever done but it never is. There’s always more and more. There’s no free time. What is the point in all that? If my writings can change it for just one child, give just one parent some awareness and support to go out there and change things, I will have more than done my job here.

    I happen to have an extremely bright, highly motivated child. With ADD. She gets the gold star. Not the school. She and her parents. She is as well read as she is, as intellectually curious as she is, not because of her years in public school but in spite of it. She gets all the credit.

    This is a kid, who despite a disability, adversity, hauls herself out of bed seriously sleep deprived every morning despite my entreaties to get to bed earlier, puts a smile on her face, and goes out there valiantly, knowing the day will throw her obstacles, to take difficult courses because she is curious and excited about her world. That her passion has not been drummed out of her is indeed a miracle.

    “It is a miracle creativity has survived formal education”
    Albert Einstein

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  41. Mike says:

    *******************
    I struggle to see how any of you have any time to do anything with your kids or pertaining to their education when you have seemingly endless time to write these eloquent posts. Stop whining, do the work, and be done with it…
    Please ladies, grow up.
    ********************

    I couldn’t let the casual misogyny of this post pass. If we were men, would you accuse us of “whining”, and advise us to “grow up”? Nope, thought not.

    Maybe it doesn’t take us so long to write these posts because we’re naturally eloquent.

    It’s worth it to us to do whatever we can to improve our children’s school experience because we are passionate about our children, and passionate about their education. I don’t want to see my kids’ childhood fly by while they waste their time with crummy homework. If the homework is actually bad for them, because it shuts down their interest in learning, I would rather speak up for an hour than have them waste 10 minutes on it.

    Mike, sweetie, your testosterone has addled your nerves. Take a valium and calm down.

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  42. Thanks, FedUpMom, for catching that casual misogynous line. I’m usually so astute, yet I missed it.

    Yes, Mike darlin’, do calm down and go shoot some hoops with your kid.

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  43. Clarification: I didn’t see that line at all until FedUp highlighted it. That wouldn’t have passed my radar, had I seen it initially.

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  44. Mike- I grew up along time ago. That’s one of the points we are all making. As a grown up, I consider myself capable of creating a worthwile and enriching family environment free from school work at home.

    You “struggle to see how any of you have any time to do anything with your kids or pertainig to their education.” Honestly, I really don’t care if you see or not. However, like most men who do not navigate the grinding school world, fathers are usually left unscathed by homework and the oppressive school scene.

    Lastly, free and open discussion about a topic near to our hearts (our children) is not whining. Your tone is almost as condescending as the educational system we mothers and children navigate on a daily basis.

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  45. Courtney, you are very concerned about how “horribly students are doing in US schools.” If you teach as well as you write, you are right. Your students will have plenty to worry about. I don’t think the solution would be spending more than eight hours with you.

    Spend some time during the next several years of your higher education brushing up on your writing, grammar syntax, composition and sentence structure. You’ll do more for those unfortunate US children than all the useless classroom management courses you are bound to take.

    And while you’re at it, take a course on homework. If you can find it. Because studies show many teachers never took a single course in homework and have no idea how to implement it, what benefits it yields (hint: none in elementary) and how long it truly takes a child to complete, after a long day sitting still at school. Many assign it as a knee jerk reaction, it’s what our grandmothers had to do, and because the principal insists.

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  46. i am the kid that is in all of the honors classes and i for 1 hate everything they assighn for homework. work is for school. not to bring home to hate just as much!

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